My phone rang at 6:30 this morning. Repeatedly. Even if you account for daylight savings ignorance, it's still too damn early. Add the additional factor that it's the morning following the Saturday before Halloween and then its really f**king early. As I'm cursing Aunt Irma or Grandma, both equally guilty until proven otherwise, I reach for the phone to check caller-id.
It's neither.
A hypothetical question: if Captain Morgan, the same Captain Morgan you're not supposed to be seeing anymore for reasons too stupid to go into, rings your front door twenty-trillion times at 6:30 in the morning, do you let him in? And if you do, is it really so bad that you open the covers to him? Because sometimes, just sometimes, isn't that warm, sweet breath next to you better than a principle?
Sunday, October 30, 2005
Friday, October 28, 2005
Ten Reasons to Date Younger
10. Increased access to new music and I’m not talking about the kind of shite you hear on the radio. Also, an easy willingness to attend really late shows because of their youthful ability to function the next day at work with little to no sleep.
9. Vocabulary. Still relying on “awesome” or ”hottie”? No longer. Next time you see that phat shorty coming off the beach with his wet suit down pulled down to his hip bones, tell him his surfing was sick.
8. Trivial pursuit. You will kick ass.
7. Depending on the amount of years you have up on your younger lover, or YL, you will look amazingly experienced in all sorts of ways – especially in bed.
6. While some people may question WTF you’re doing with him, others will be wondering, how did she attract such a young buck…intriguing.
5. [In theory] you earn more money.
4. When you date older men, especially super-successful, over-achieving older men, the advice can be endless and unwelcome, and even worse, your opinions may be ignored. With your YL, your thoughts are sought out and valued.
3. Instant cred because you’ve seen Black Flag, Jane’s Addiction, and Depeche Mode live and up close.
2. Enthusiasm and endurance. Remember what it was like to be with someone who could go all night. Now imagine that’s your new reality.
1. If they’re with you, it’s because they really want to be. And that’s really, really sweet.
9. Vocabulary. Still relying on “awesome” or ”hottie”? No longer. Next time you see that phat shorty coming off the beach with his wet suit down pulled down to his hip bones, tell him his surfing was sick.
8. Trivial pursuit. You will kick ass.
7. Depending on the amount of years you have up on your younger lover, or YL, you will look amazingly experienced in all sorts of ways – especially in bed.
6. While some people may question WTF you’re doing with him, others will be wondering, how did she attract such a young buck…intriguing.
5. [In theory] you earn more money.
4. When you date older men, especially super-successful, over-achieving older men, the advice can be endless and unwelcome, and even worse, your opinions may be ignored. With your YL, your thoughts are sought out and valued.
3. Instant cred because you’ve seen Black Flag, Jane’s Addiction, and Depeche Mode live and up close.
2. Enthusiasm and endurance. Remember what it was like to be with someone who could go all night. Now imagine that’s your new reality.
1. If they’re with you, it’s because they really want to be. And that’s really, really sweet.
Thursday, October 27, 2005
Damn Hippies
I was having dinner with friends tonight and the conversation meandered over favorite short stories, the beauty of Russian literature, how many indictments will result from the CIA leak case, and...well, you get the picture. But the best comment thrown out all evening was that patchouli, scent of choice with idealistic eco undergrads and participants in drum circles, is considered a product to avoid by some conservationists. Apparently the herb is farmed on land next to or within rainforests and the plots are feared to be creating forest fragmentation, most notably in Orangutan habitats.
While I understand that some of you will argue that a small local farmer somewhere is benefiting economically from his or her patchouli cultivation, to my mind, it's another reason for a zero-tolerance policy when it comes to hippies.
While I understand that some of you will argue that a small local farmer somewhere is benefiting economically from his or her patchouli cultivation, to my mind, it's another reason for a zero-tolerance policy when it comes to hippies.
Tuesday, October 25, 2005
Good Night and Sleep in Peace
I know this is being posted all over the place but we've (yes, we) have just hit a horrific milestone in the Iraq-US war; the death toll is now at 2000 US fatalities. This is a tragic waste of life. But we cannot only look at those soldiers from the United States who have died; the number of Iraqi fatalities is growing daily as well. And I cannot help but wonder what percentage of those deaths overseas, those attrocities thousands of miles away from our homes and far from our families, were civilian?
Regardless of the label, civilian or military, let's pause for a moment and acknowledge those who have died in this pointless war.
Regardless of the label, civilian or military, let's pause for a moment and acknowledge those who have died in this pointless war.
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